Sigh. What is it – day 32,942 of lockdown? All I know is that I haven’t even contemplated wearing deodorant in several weeks, and – more importantly…

Today, the whole world was supposed to be seeing Marvel’s Black Widow.

My eyes are watering, and I don’t know if it’s because I’m sad I’m missing out on this film, or because the stench from my pits are stinging my retina.

Scarlett Johansson’s outing as Natasha Romanoff was set for release on Friday, 1 May, but instead – thanks to the current coronavirus pandemic – is now set for a early November release.

You think that’s bad? I’ve been waiting since, about, 34BC for the release of New Mutants.

Much like an AA meeting – not that I’ve been to any* – I thought it would be best to speak to like-minded people; others who were also devastated by the lack of Black Widow in their lives, so where did I turn?

Twitter. Naturally.

* I’m not an alcoholic; I prefer the term ‘drinking enthusiast’.

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