Star Wars is one of the greatest movie franchises of all time. But you didn’t need me to tell you that, did you? (That wasn’t rhetorical. Please tell me you were aware of Star Wars.)
But there’s a few improvements that we can all agree would make the intergalactic saga just that little bit better – firstly, let’s get rid of that whining piss of crap, Hayden Christensen. And secondly, let’s have a scene where Chewbacca looks in the fridge, sees a bag labelled “DEAD DOVE. Do Not Eat!”, and when he peeks inside, he says “I don’t know what I expected”.*
Or, y’know, he sorta growls that. Whatever. It would still be funny.
Since Ron Howard has taken over the upcoming spin-off, Han Solo: A Star Wars Story – and just providing all-round eyegasms in the form of Donald Glover in jazzy suits – Nerdist have created an incredible spoof video, combining Howard’s narration from Arrested Development, with the original Star Wars trilogy.
And you know the best part of all of this? I’m not bitter that I didn’t think of this. Not. One. Bit… I’ve made a huge mistake.*
Still, before I get in some weird, dark wormhole of pining twine to walls and trying to find niche connections between movies in an attempt to make viral parodies, here’s some money. Go see a Star War.*
*Sigh. I’ve added this footnote to indicate where I’ve put an Arrested Development quote. Now at least you can pretend you understood what you spent the last six minutes watching. Just go bloody buy a TV already, won’t you?